Watching Over You

12/04/2021 – Poem a Day Compilation



As I stand here

Watching over you

Watching you sleep

The rise and fall of your tiny chest

I wonder what the future holds

For you

For me

For the both of us together

The fun and games as a family

The outings to the beach

Or boating on the river

Creating memories that last a lifetime

In moments that are gone too soon

But I’m also filled with a fear

That I’m not good enough

That I might fail you

And I don’t know how to deal

With the overwhelming dread

That leads me to contemplate

Whether I should be here

Standing over you

Whether it wouldn’t be better

If it were someone else

Watching over you

In the future

19/02/2021 –  Poem a Day Compilation



For Joshua Garrett and his mother, Katt



In the future I will be brave

But right now, I want to scream 

I long to hold you in my arms

And hear your plaintiff cries



In the future I will remember you

When others just want to forget

Because thinking of you is hard

But forgetting would be worse



In the future I want to hear your name

Said with all the love in the world

Because you were here and I love you

Though you were barely two months old



In the future I want to reminisce

About the time we had with you

But people won’t even mention you

For fear of how they’ll feel



In the future I will still grieve

But I want there to be happy tears

When I think of that precious time we had

And not how you’re no longer here



In the future I want to celebrate you

And what you meant to me

Not hide your memory away inside

Like a secret of which to be ashamed



In the future I will say your name

For everyone to hear

For you are a part of me

To which I will never say goodbye

In Hindsight

18/01/2021 – Poem a Day Compilation



Looking back

I can see

That you

Were a mistake

That I can never

Undo.



Looking back

I know

I wouldn’t change

A single thing

Because you

Gave me him.

Heartbeat

13/10/2020 - Poem a Day Compilation



Do you hear that sound?

The tiny glumph, glumph –

That too fast beat –

Which signals new life

Awaiting its day in the sun.



Do you see that flutter?

The smallest butterfly wings

Could not be as delicate

Nor as beautifully perfect

As that on the screen before us.



Do you feel that rush?

The infinitesimally tender

Yet most powerful wave

You could ever experience

In your whole life.



Do you know that realisation?

The grain of sand

That will become a pearl –

Our pearl –

Encased in our hearts forever.

Becoming a Parent

09/05/2020 - Iso Well-Being Compilation

 

No one really tells you what it’s like.

You hear the horror stories, of course.

And you hear about how you’ll never be the same

But you don’t know until it happens.

 

No one tells you how much of yourself

You lock in a box, away from harm,

Because there’s a little creature here

Who needs you more than anything.

 

No one tells you just how much you gain,

Feeling like your heart will burst,

And that, no matter how old they are,

You still have infinite love to give.

 

No one tells you how scared you’ll be.

Not just for this small human

But for yourself and your partner,

Through every trial and tribulation.

 

No one tells you about the doubt

And the second guessing you’ll do,

Because there’s no manual to follow

And no instruction leaflet.

 

No one tells you about the tears at 3am

When they have their first fever

And you don’t know who to call

Because your brain is fried.

 

No one tells you about the absolute pride

When they say their first words,

When they take their first steps,

Or when they buy their first car.

 

No one tells you that it’s ok to have a c-section

Or to adopt or use a surrogate,

And that it’s ok to feed them formula

Or let them cry themselves to sleep.

 

No one tells you about the piles of laundry

That never seem to end,

Even when they’re teenagers

And can probably wash their own clothes.

 

No one tells you about the mistakes you’ll make

Because we’re all only human

And no one is ever going to be perfect,

Not even that wee little bairn.

 

No one tells you about the good times –

The times you’ll get it fantastically right –

When you’ll jump for joy all day

And want to shout it from the rooftops.

 

No one tells you in a way you’ll understand:

You’ll hear the words they’ll say

But they won’t really sink in

Until you’ve lived every moment.

 

No one tells you because they can’t.