Men-Talk

27/01/2021 – Poem a Day Compilation



The men folk meet at the local pub

Tired from a long day at the office

And looking forward to a few drinks

With their mates and colleagues

To celebrate making it through

Another week in the rat race.



They talk about sports they follow

Whose team is set to win or lose

And whether they’ll get to the game

Or watch it on their new flat screen TV

While they eat too many chips

And drink too many beers.



Someone asks how the kids are

And they brag about their achievements,

Or how much they’ve grown

Then, in the very next breath,

Complain about how messy they are

And that they won’t do as they’re told.



What no one talked about that night

Was Daniel’s two-week-old test results

That told him he had cancer

And would have been caught earlier

If only Matthew had mentioned

His father had the same symptoms years ago.



Christopher didn’t bring up the promotion

He thought he was going to get

But found out he missed out on

And now he doesn’t know how

To tell his wife they can’t afford the wedding

She’d had her heart set on.



No one asked Andrew and James

How the meeting with the adoption agency went

Because they haven’t brought it up

And everyone is worried that it’s bad news

So they don’t want to spoil the night

By bringing everyone down.



There’s an awkward silence in the group

When the news comes on because

That paedophile Ben used to work with

Is the only thing any of the stations

Seem to be talking about

And it makes him really upset to see it.



Luke told everyone he broke up with his girlfriend

When really she broke up with him

And he is heartbroken beyond belief

But guys don’t talk about that

They don’t show emotions

And they don’t share feelings.



Next week they’re going to Tim’s funeral

Because he bottled up what was happening,

And that black dog took over

Eating at him from the inside out

Until all that was left was a pile of clothes

And a note tucked into one of his shoes.



Mark can’t take it anymore,

He wishes he could have seen the signs

Or asked the right questions

Because his best mate is gone

And he’s lost and alone

In this sea of people smiling through their pain.



Paul sees the first tear fall

And then another and another.

He puts his arm around his mate’s shoulder

And doesn’t ask him if he’s ok,

He doesn’t need to hear that I’m fine lie again

Because he’s heard it too many times before.



He knows that just today

Eight people took their own lives,

Over one hundred more attempted,

And seventy five percent of those deaths

Were men just like the ones he’s sitting with

Who are less afraid of dying than speaking.



There’s not much he can do or say

To take away the pain anyone feels

But he is intimately aware of the need

For his friends to be open and honest

With themselves and with each other

So they can see the light at the end of the tunnel.



He reaches into his pocket for his wallet,

Removing a card that’s seen better days –

Its corners torn from months of indecision

But the number still bright at the centre –

“Just in case,” he says as he hands it over,

Wishing it didn’t have to be like this.



It didn’t have to be like this

And all it took was a small gesture –

No one could have foreseen in the next months

The changes that would come about

Because of a mate who understood

And a conversation three words long.



At Tim’s funeral, Mark made a promise

To every man that he knew

That he would not just ask if they were ok

But really listen to the answer

And to be there not just for Friday night drinks

But for those despairing 3am calls.



Luke confided in Mark how he was feeling

And they both realised they weren’t alone –

They worked through things together

And it came upon them like a revelation

That being mates was more than “how are you?”

And more than saying you’re not ok.



The boys rallied around Ben,

Because that’s what mates should do –

No matter what, friends are there to remind you

That it’s ok to be upset when you’re betrayed

By someone you should have been able to trust

And there is no time limit for feeling how you feel.



Andrew and James decided to tell the group

They had been approved for adoption

Yet hadn’t told anyone because

Of the fear of failure

That they wouldn’t get their child

That they wouldn’t be good parents.



Sometimes a vote of confidence

Or a practical helping hand

Can uplift a spirit when it’s down

Which Christopher soon found to be true

When he explained his distress

To be met with assistance all round.



And instead of going paintballing

The mates got check-ups instead

And made a roster for Daniel’s care

When the chemo took its toll

Of who was bringing meals to him

And driving him to his appointments.



But it took the loss of one of their own

To make these men take heed

Of the need to be more trusting

And to have those hard conversations

So, don’t learn the lesson the hard way,

Take notice of these words



Your mates will not think less of you

For being broken by circumstance –

They’ve probably felt the same as you

Or can empathise with you pain –

They are there to help you to rebuild

And forge a new and shining path.

Mood

08/12/2020 - Poem a Day Compilation



I’d like to escape from myself sometimes

When the sadness overwhelms me.

It’s always with me, deep inside

A sinking melancholy dragging me down.



I am forlorn and in despair,

There is nothing I can do

No saving grace to pull me through

And I must only survive this downheartedness.



I am not worth the time or effort

To repair my broken soul.

Just abandon me here,

Because I am not of any value.



It is laughable that I should be held

To be the best person for the job

Regardless of what the position is,

I will never meet the requirements.



I hate myself for feeling this way

But there’s no one to blame by myself,

Every day, I must atone for the wrong

That I have wrought every day prior.



I think about the world without me,

How much better that might be.

If I weren’t here to screw things up,

And no one would miss me anyhow.



I don’t want to go out to the movies,

Or read that book you recommended.

I don’t want to play football this year,

I just can’t be bothered anymore.



People say they’re trying to help

But they don’t stick around very long,

They get tired of me and leave,

Not that I blame them for that.



I haven’t slept in so long,

Not real sleep, anyway.

I lie awake at night, staring at the ceiling,

Wondering why I’m even here.



I don’t eat anymore.

Not unless I’m forced to.

The doctors say it’s unhealthy

But they don’t really care.



I just want to be left alone,

To stay in bed and not do anything,

I don’t want to move, or work,

Or talk to these people who say they’re friends.



Don’t talk to me right now,

I can’t focus on what you’re saying.

My mind is off, somewhere,

Anywhere but here.



No, I don’t know what I want to put on,

I don’t care what colour it is,

Why are you asking me to decide?

I don’t know what you want.



I stood at the top of the cliffs

I swallowed all the pills in the cabinet

I drove into a tree at high speed

But none of you will let me go.



The pain I feel is excoriating,

Every joint aches all the time.

I just want to be free from it all

And to not have the agony prolonged.



My bag is packed and under my bed,

Like it has been since I was twelve

I don’t want to be here

But you won’t let me leave this place.



Nothing I do is right,

I can’t live like this any more

The constant attempts and failures

Are eating away at my very soul.



You all have it so easy,

You breeze through every hurdle.

I hate what this world has made me

And I hate the world as well.



One day I will burn this place

And everything it contains.

Maybe it will take me, too,

And I will be at peace.